Manifesting soft lives for Black women this month

I recently met with a male doctor to discuss a medical procedure.

When I asked if it would hurt, his exact words were “It will hurt, but you’ll be fine. You’re strong.”

That was the moment I cancelled all future appointments. I didn’t feel safe with him.

Statistically, Black women are among the most underserved, less protected, and undervalued members of society. One of the most damaging stereotypes that contribute to these numbers as well as harm our bodies, wellbeing, and mental health is the trope of the “Strong Black Woman”. From medical practitioners minimising our pain leading to the highest mortality rates during childbirth to self-advocacy over our bodies being labelled aggressive or belligerent.

You see, describing someone as a “Strong Black Woman” means they’re somewhat impervious to both physical and emotional pain. A woman who can take sustained daily stress from societal microaggressions. And minority stress is one of the leading causes of mental health issues among Black women.

I once came across a beautiful Swedish proverb that says, “the deepest well can also be drained”. For me, it directly talks about mental health, especially for Black women who are some of society’s deepest wells. Through my own work as a storyteller, I create space for Black women to feel and express their range of emotions without reducing them to stereotypes.

When Black women exude confidence or are assertive, we’re perceived as aggressive. When Black women advocate for themselves, we are seen as combative and difficult. Imagine the mental toll that takes on Black women who are already battling microaggressions both at work and in society.

Living the soft life prioritises comfort and relaxation over societal expectations. Living the soft life says, “I’m already more than enough”.

At Tala Thrive, we want Black women to live as fully and unapologetically as we can. That’s why we match and connect you with culturally competent therapists and coaches who understand your culture, language and/or religion.

Be sure to sign up at Tala Thrive to join our community!

Remember, we want you to thrive - mentally, physically, and emotionally - so you can start living the life you truly deserve.